Another Inside Pic

No long story today with this pic, actually wasn't even going to post it, but at the end I said, ok, just for the scary eyes in this.

Lets see how many people run away screaming. :D

Kisses
Jessica aka "Scary Eyes"

Outside little trips

So well to continue my history, ther I was inside all quiet, but one of the purposes of this time was to go outside. And so I I did. Not really big outings, but they were time outside as girl.

So first time, was like around 6 afternoon, plenty of sunlight, of course I didn't went outside alone, got two people going with me, since they also wanted to go to the near by store. So there we go, out on the street,walking around in the neighborhood.

Crossed a few people on the walk, this time I look to their faces, trying to see any reaction, but most of them were like emotionless faces. Ony person who like put attention to all 3 of us, was this man walking his dog, but I think was more because of the dog, than caring about us.

After a while we arrive to store. First like panic, since just a couple of hours I have gone to that same store to buy a bottle of water, on my way to Blush. But was no other option but to go in. Inside the store there was this guy and the same cashier as before.

So we go in, each going toward the fridge, buying their stuff, the guy just kept looking toward me, not buying anything, just standing there, quite creepy. Then time to pay for the purchases. Oh god, had to come face to face to the cashier. I look with as much attention as possible, trying to figure out if there was any sign of recognition (how paranoid I am, like if a cashier who saws the faces of hundreds of people a day would remember me, jejej) But no funny looks, no surprise eyes. All nervous I paid, and said thanks.

So back to place, I open my bag again, to take a photo of the outing, and then remembered, that on the airport they asked to remove batteries from camera (not sure why such things in Mexico, plus it is actually more risk the batteries going loose on backpack in cargo cointainer, than safely inside the camera, silly), so no pic there.

SEcond time out, was more into the night, the owners of Blush went to buy some bread, so I asked, "Can I go with you?" and they said "Ok", so there I went out at night, this time I knew camera got batteries, since already took the domino picture. Crossed very few people, and at night so not really like they got a good view of me. At bread store the ttedand could have saw me, and so did a lady who came inside, I think she smiled, not sure if courtesy or because I was looking funny.

And so the pic is from that second time outside. Not really like the big trips to the outside, but more longer than any other before. Plus this time I was a lot less nervous, so could look into other people faces, and enjoy it.

And so ends the recap from the little Jessica adventure.

Kisses
Crazy and Stupid Jessica

Playing Domino

Ok, so last weekend I travelled to Mexico city to do some family errands on Sunday.
So Saturday, got the day for doing personal stuff. So I decided It was a good day to let Jessica be a little bit.

So I went to do some shopping, mainly to get stuff I needed for the boy aleter-ego and got myself a pair of girl clothes. The blue one in pic is one of them.

Once in the afternoon, I went again to Blush, this time, was a lot less nervous of the fact of people seeing both sides of me, since they have already done so.

So I got myself dressed, and applied make-up, except the eyes that Claudia (the make-up girl there) helped me doing ( I still got trouble with that, my eyes have this tendency to close, whenever I got something near to them).

the rest of the afternnon was spent staying there, playing dominoes with people around there.

I got to go out a few times, but that a story for the next pic.

In all, it was good, and I felt happy of doing it again.


Kisses
Jessica

Bugs and Spider from the Jungle (Also I am angry for pluto declared no longer a planet)

Sorry, I know a girl should not said such ugly words as I am going to but

I AM COMPLETELY ANGRY
Who the hell do those stupid astronomers who said Pluto no longer a planet think they are, wait my mistake, they don't think.

According to the news, now Pluto no longer a planet, its now a dawrf, WHAT??
that's bullshit.

Sorry, I know its not ladylike to curse like that, but that really made me angry. Pluto is my second most favorite planet (and just because Saturn is prettier).

Ok, now to the picture.
So extra to the monkeys and big animals, the jungle was full of little animals, insects, frogs, bugs, and the ones not capable of flying are easier to shot (with a camera).

There were these big butterflies in a nice blue tone and others in black with green spots, but they always were flying and moving, And was unable to get any decent pic of them :(

I like insect photos, being able to see them in big is cool, plus is like seeing the big monsters from old horror movies, plues sometimes If got lucky, I can even see details like eyes, or hairy legs, and such.

Ok, now to the explaining.

Top left, a big scary spider, at some roads (not the main ones) you got to walk really carefull, or risk getting one of them in your face.

Top right, some cool black and yellow bug.

Middle Left, some bug walking on a tree branch, I like the texture on the bug, so similar to the tree.

Middle right, a Snail, they not as slow as I thought.

Bottom Left, a Tarantula Spider, I actually like tarantulas, as opposed to other spiders, guess has to be with the fur/hair. Oh and they are not poisonus.

Bottom right, I saw those two insects fighting, not sure who was trying to eat who, but guess that being on web, it was the little black spider trying to eat the big insect.

Ok, so that last of Jungle pics to post, this time.

Kisses
Jessica, the insect chick

full size image, over here http://static.flickr.com/83/224435956_03c30fc9ef_b.jpg

Of peacocks and monkeys

The best part of the jungle trip, was that I was able to see monkeys, YEAAAAAAAAAAH

I love monkeys, they are so funny and cute.

I got to see other wild animals.

In photos I only got wild Peacocks and two kinds of monkeys. I also got to see lots of different kind of birds (no pics, they fly too fast into hiding) and a small feline.

According to it there are also deers, jaguar (which at some moment a groar was heard, but really far away), wild pigs and other felines. One of the arch site caretaker, told me that a few weeks ago they found a dead animal, with jaguar bites near there, so that was probably the one that we heard.

Oh, I even got the monkeys on video, of course, really bad quality, but still moving monkeys.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rCvzJCiRH4E

Anyway, now to the photo description

Top left, some Mono Araña (spider monkey is the literal translation to English)

Top Right, a cute frog.

Middle Left, a couple of wild peacocks

Middle right, a howling monkey (mono aullador)

Bottom left, more Monkeys

Bottom Right, a big peacock family.

thats all
Jessica, The Monkey lover

A girl in a balcony near Jungle

Jejej, Jessica (that's me) managed to put some clothes inside the evil alter-ego backpack. So once the pyramids and jungle exploring has finished, and after diner, back at hotel.

Initial plan was to go to the cabin rental place, but in the dark of night and all the rain, didn't see the entrance, so instead I stayed at hotel, cool thing of this hotel, is near town, but outside, in the borders of jungle reserve, so still can hear the sounds of nature at night.

So, at night, and since in room area I was, there were only a couple in a room at opposite side, so I decided to put on my girl clothes, wig, and basic make-up (thats why the pic is small). and out to the balcony, to enjoy the cool weather, the light breeze, hoping mosquitoes didn't bite me that much.

Wonderful, to just sit there, relaxing, drinking some water, hearing the sounds of the night jungle, and all that as a girl. Amazing.

Probably would have been most interesting to do it in the cabin place, but maybe would have happened, like that time in Palenque, too many mosquitoes, that I couldn't go out, even in boy clothes at night.

Kisses
Jessica

Exploring the jungle at Calakmul

A few shots of the Jungle
As I told in the previous pic, Calakmul is not only an Archeological Site, its also a Jungle Biological Reserve.

Its big, they told me how big, but I have bad memory so I forgot the exact figure, and I am too lazy too look it in Internet.

Wow, while going out , an to the town, it started raining, wow, It was massive rain, could barely see. And as you can see in pics, a few hours before not even the most remote hint of such rain.

Ok, now to explain the images.

Top Left, is some tree-branch formation , I just liked the texture and shape it has.

Top Middle, a view from top of outer Piramid, you can see the top of other two pyramids, and how green the jungle looks from above.

Top Right, one of the few areas of jungle that you could walk easily, love the green in the floor.

Bottom Left, one of the road inside the jungle, really great to hear the sounds of birds, and to spot an ocasional squirrel.

Bottom Center, view from top of Main pyramid, easier to see top of the other pyramid in front at Main Acropolis in Calakmul.

An Bottom Right, a view of a part of the jungle, not so easy to walk in there, pretty thight.

I really enjoyed this, looking into all those greens, so many plants, the sounds of the wild, just amazing, so different to where I used to live, where green only was seen on cactus.

Kisses
Jessica, the jungle explorer

For the full size image go here
http://static.flickr.com/65/221965729_a4f9824602_b.jpg

Some Archeology Lessons from Weekend

So this weekend, the evil alter-ego decided said, "Hey look there is this Archeological site I still haven't visited, let's go there".

It was amazing. A few archeological sites, all really impressive, plus they are located inside a biological reserve area, the Calakmul Jungle. Wow.

The Calakmul siite, is really big, plus the jungle around it is really dense.

Now to the description of the pics.

Top left, is the Main Pyramid in the Main Acroppolis section of Calakmul, is really big, several estelas in the front Yep I went all the way up twice.

Top Right, is a detail of a king statue, in the Three Kings Monunment in Balamku, it is inside a Pyramid, pretty amazing, lots of details.

Bottom Left, is the top of one of the pyramids in Hormiguero, very rich in decorations.

Bottom Right, Is another pyramid in Calakmul, outside the Main Acropolis. Really Big, and great view of the jungle from the top.

Lots of walking, lots of climbing, now my legs are all tired, but that's good, and was really fun.

Kisses
Jessica, the silly Archeologist

Wig Problems

Yesterday I spent 1 hour trying to disentangle the long wig (after the hidding, it came out all full with knots), kind of make a 30% progress, so with hope it might be ready, maybe next week :(

Ok, here a couple more of those pics with the blue skirt. Also the new bag.



Kisses
Jessica

Funny green fellow

In a city 2 hours away from were I live, there is this archeological site with a little zoo, in it there is this big thing with lots of birds.

I love going there, and see all the birds, lots of colors, and to see them so close (even touch some)

I like this green one, he seem so happy that I took pics of him while eating

:)

Sleepy Jessica, the first run into the Internet

So back to the boring historical posts but I need to write them from time to time, so last time if I remember correctly I wrote the
way I decided my girl name and how I created a girl e-mail.

So there I went back to the sites I have previously founded about other tgirls on the internet. and few of them have guestbooks, or an e-mail addrress to contact the owner of the webpage.
So I decide to write some comments on the guestbooks, or send some "hello, my name is Jessica" e-mails.

Some days passed, and I went into the email account, and surprise, there was a response to one of my e-mails.
And was even better, was that it was a really nice e-mail, this girl thanked me for the nice comments, and then she moved on to offer all help and advice she could give me. It felt incredible, Jessica has made a first contact to someone, at least on e-mail.
I continue to write with Tanya, tought most of the emails was more me doing questions and such. Unfortunately, I lost track of her during one of my periods of inactivity. Also lost her e-mail adress since I was not able to remember my old ID, much less a password :(
But to her, a thousand thanks for being so nice to me back then.

With time more responses came along, some were nice, some were responses, and other ones scared me (maybe too hardcore or sexual intended that I got scared)

But I notice another thing during that time, I did created a small webpage then, but with no pictures.
Some of the responses were simply a "Hello back" and asking for my webpage or pics.
And from those, I never received a second response e-mail, kind of like "No pic, no contact". Sad.

At the end of that phase, I was writting to 3 girls from time to time, and to they my thanks.
Unfortunately later I went through another phase of no Jessica, forgot my e-mail ID, and lost any contacts I had.

Next time I will write about the adventures of Jessica on the ICQ (something like a very old version of messenger)

Kisses
Jessica

Hidden face, and Tofu taste funny

A little recap from the weekend

Got to go working in saturday morning, and then on the afternoon time to do a complete cleaning of the appartment (too tired to go out, just stayed home and went to sleep early)

Went to beach Sunday morning (this time I remembered to caryy sun-blocker, so no burned skin, GREAT)
I got to eat tofu salad, first time I ate tofu, that tofu thing taste funny (But at least has a taste, as opposed to soybean hamburguers, who taste like nothing)

Back to home Sunday afternoon, so I decided to let Jessica reappear, lost practice on make up.
Plus realized, that on the 3 weeks my femme side was hidden, that evil boy managed to gain weight, now I am fat :(

Later managed to take courage to take a drive around the house in the car, only inside the car. Mmm, seems like that's only way of letting Jessica go out, in late car drives.

Seems like thats it, not much to tell about my weekend

Kisses
Jessica

Some Pretty Dragonflies

Some cute little insects they are
And some pretty colors they have. Love the blue one.

Well, maybe will have pics of Jessica soon, if the time and activities this weekend allow such.

Oh better see the big size pic here, http://static.flickr.com/68/213240797_e9cf4b88a0_o.jpg

Kisses
Jessica

Visiting the swamps

Ok, no new Jessica's pics, so be posting pics of trips with family

Top left, is the swamps (manglar in spanish), the trees have their roots out in the air and into the water.

Top Right, is the river, some plants floating aronud

Bottom left, is a pic from the observation tower, you can see the 3 river becoming 1, according to the people there is the second biggest river thingie in terms of water volumes in America (Quick geography question, whats #1??)

And bottom right, a bird

Kisses
Jessica

IT'S true. Pornography can make you blind

Ok, so I was reading some news site, and found this link



http://www.economist.com/printedition/displayStory.cfm?story_id=4292593&fsrc=RSS



Apparently, if you look into a gory or erotic image, you go blind for 0.8 seconds



Funny

Fungi from travelling

So went travelling again this weekend

It's rain season around here, so all that water is good for the fungi to grow. Lots of fungi and mushrooms.

So the image is a compose of the 4 photos I think I manage not to ruin

I like how those thingies looks

Kisses
Jessica

Long Hair

Ok so I got this long hair wig.
Look a little weird

Theoretically I can try to style it a little bit.

So I will try that next time



Kisses
Jessica

The ugly bed pose

I just wanted to change the picture on top of the blog
Gosh, month number 8 is starting already
2/3 of the year pssing, and going away too fast

Better hurry to check those new year promises and put speed in doing them

Kisses
Jessica

Attack of the killer ants

Well the description of this pic is very simple, is what happens when one forgets to throw the saturday breakfast recipient to the trashcan.
You go all happy on travel, enjy a happy weekend
Only to return home on Sunday to a house infested with those little ants all over the place
Horror de horrores

Run, run for your life
:)

When is Jessica's birthday???

Stop, before you say “Happy Birthday” it is not today, at least not my biological one.

Why am I doing this question??? Is it some kind of philosophical question that needs to be resolved for the existence of Jessica?? Or is it just some morbid attempt to seek attention?? Or simply a silly doubt?? For me it is just a silly doubt, which I will approach later in the post.

Before I will explain why do I ask it today?? Well during weekend a couple of people send a request to add my birthday to some birthday reminder thingy. And I could easily put the date of my biological birth as human being. But no, instead I started asking myself about it.

But the question still remains?? Is that date, also the date of birthday of Jessica??? Or is Jessica’s birthday some other date during the year???

The easier part will be to say both sides of me share birthdays, being that Jessica only exist in the little moments I let her express by dressing and as a shadow identity on this unreality of Internet, then it would be no problem if Jessica has the same date of birthday as the boy, since its not like she will have to attend a party. So the biological-mind entity will have to be happy with the birthday as boy.

But what if Jessica doesn’t like it, what if she prefers a quiet party with cake and tea, instead of pizza and beer as her counter-ego?? What if she better go see a movie with a couple of friends than going to dance and get drunk like the boy??? What if in a future Jessica does start to exist beyond the limits imposed to herself so far?? What if she even met people to celebrate with??? Jessica will have to accept the fact, that she shares the body with the boy entity, and such body can’t be in two places at the same time, or even more difficult show both aspects at the same time. So having the same birthday date as the boy might be complicated.

Plus, if when creating my female side, I was capable of selecting name, why can I select date of birth. Plus is not like I am making myself younger by saying I was born in 1984 instead of the actual year I was born, at most is a couple of weeks. Right??? And other thing is if I select a different date (at least one month different) to be Jessica’s birthday I can have two birthday party per year.

And if I decide to select a different date to be Jessica’s birthday, which date would that be?? Would it be the date I first try a female piece of clothing (which by the way I don’t remember even the exact year)??, or would it be when first fully dressed? Or the date I bought my first girl clothing?? Or the date I decided to call myself Jessica?? Or would it be the date of the start of this new phase??

But then what happens if someone that already knows the boy met the girl side, or vice-versa, is not like that person is going to be too convinced to say “happy Birthday” to me twice per year.

Maybe I am just complicating myself a lot with this, since no matter how much I thought about it, I can’t come with a decision. When is Jessica’s birthday?? When and why??

Kisses
A confused and silly Jessica

Apology 2

Sorry
If I sounded bad, or mean, or disrespectfull in the last pic posting.
I apologize

:)

A lingerie Pic

I know that by now after seeing the pic, you all hating me, ready to scream lier, and fraud.

Well you know there was a little reading problem
I wrote two options either a picture of me smiling or a lingerie pic
See, it doesn't says a pinture of me in lingerie, it say "a lingerie pic", and that's what the photo is , a lingerie pic.
Jejeje, I know, I am abusing about a little innacuracy of language, but hey, I am a sweet little girl.
You already knew a wasn't going to post myself only wearing lingerie.

:)

Kisses
Jessica

A picture of me smiling

Ok I posted a little poll a few days ago, to select betwwen two options for a picture
I wrote two options either a picture of me smiling or a lingerie pic.
So I counted the votes Saturday
The results:

2 people voted for a picture of me Smiling
3 people voted for a picture of me in lingerie
6 people voted for a picture of both (me in lingerie and Smiling)

Oh seems like people want to see me wearing lingerie and smiling.

Well for the moment Here is the winning picture.

A picture of me smiling.
What?? but thats the one with least votes
Well explanation is in the lingerie pic. (tomorrow)

Mmmm, still thinking my smile looks creepy. :D

Kisses
Jessica

Jessica secluded

Ok.
So today started the weeks that Jessica need to hide from the eyes of family visitors.
I'm sure I will be more than happy with the family around that I will not be thinking about Jessica not being able to be around
Yet, it was extrange to look into the wardrobe, and notice that all the pretty dresses and skirts were no longer there.


I like this pic, a good chance to show my nails and hide my face :)

About the poll results and pics, tomorrow I'll post

Kisses
Jessica

Evil VS Good

Standing in the mirror.
One of the crazy ideas I had as a kid, was that the person in the mirror was like the image of another me, in a parallell world, but thats was the opposite.
So I thought the one in the mirror was like the evil twin.
Now I Know I was wrong as kid.
The evil one is the one in this side :)

A little Poll

This weekend I'll do a last photo session before a forced dissapearing for a little time.
Worry not, nothing bad happened.
I am just having visitors at home, for which I am very happy. But for such visitors I need to hide and keep away everything related to Jessica.
So for a little while, Jessica is going to dissapear.

So for the photosession I want to try and model the new clothes and shoes I got from shopping this weekend.
And while on that I want to make a picture I haven't done before.

I have two options either a picture of me smiling or a lingerie pic.
Which photo should I shot???


Kisses
Jessica

Looking for 10 minutes

I can be very silly sometimes, thinking I have lost things when they aren't lost.
Like today, I was ready to return from lunch time. And spent like 10 minutes looking for the car keys, while holding them all the time in my hand.

About the picture, , at the hotel room I staed they had this little corner seat bench, I tried a few poses. I liked this 2 with this outfit.
One on the left kind of innocent looking, the one in the right kind of a relaxed feeling.

Kisses
Jessica

The Non-Photo-Day

A few time ago I was invited to go against the Non

Photo Day at this group

Aparently someone decided to go against taking pictures for July 17th. So I took a few pics.


So I went to take photos, I liked this fountain, the rest of the pics are here at J

Risky Shopping

I went shopping this weekend.
For both personalities, the race was close, but at the end the boy bought more (Which is good, I was scared I would end up spending more in the girl side, that's scary)
Wow, the make-up thingies, can add up, to be expensive really quickly.
Thanks a lot to Jolene for all the fashion tips.
Since I have a little guide for shopping it was really easy, walk in, show a salesperson the little images of what I was looking for, and see if I liked them and size was ok.
Still was a little difficult, since it was quite crowded in some places.

This blouse/top was bought on Saturday. I returned a little past midnight to the hotel, but somehow I just wanted to try it, So I ended up doing a few pictures.

I like the color, gives a kind of sense of tranquility.

Well enough of narcissistic babbling for today.

Kisses
Jessica

Only pic posting today

Have nothing interesting or nice to say today, so only pic posting today

Names and Chihiro

There is a movie I like a lot, In Spanish its called "El viaje de Chihiro" and under it says "Sen No Chihiro" which I suppose is the phonetic form of the original name. In USA was released like "Spirited Away"

I really can't say enough to express the beauty of this movie to convince you to watch it, it's really a piece of art, and a perfect work of animation. So trust me, and watch it.

But lets go to the part I want to share, that I like for what I posted for the history of my name, and why I decided to select Jessica based on the common letter to my boy name

At some point Haku tell Chihiro the following
"Yubaba steals people's names in order to control them. If you had lost your name, then you wouldn't know how to return home."

Shows how important a name is, in case of Chihiro, remembering her name, was a pass to freedom, the last link to the outside world she came from.

For me, selecting Jessica over other names was in a way, a link between both sides of me, a little bit of control over that side, a point to return back to the boy name.

Probably my rant is starting to sound senseless, but it's my rant

Kisses
Jessica
:)

How Jessica got her name

How Jessica got her name

Its been a while since the last past history post (here), but I promise I will try to write these more often, at least for myself, since surely they are boring :)

Well so last time I was telling you about me discovering other girls like me on the Internet, finding I was not a weird occurrence of my freaky mind.

Among the several web pages I found out, I saw a few ones, that contained guestbook or even leave an e-mail address, so I thought, hey I can write to the girls there, ask for advice, talk about this common thing. But as I clicked the first a-mail link I realized I didn’t wanted to use my boy email, even as cryptic as it was.

So I needed an email address for my female persona, and I could have just selected something like wikgirlmex or qwerty890 , if it was to be the email for this side of my personality, better choose something with a girly name.

So I started thinking, mm, if I was a girl what name would I have, mmm.
So what I did was to write a list of names, that sounded pretty, girly to me.
I remember a few of them , Anna, Delilah, Jazmin, Jessica, Karina, and maybe a few other ones.

At the end, and I am probably giving too much information with this, but anyway, I decided to choose Jessica because it shares first letter to my boy name, wanting it to be in a way related to it.

So I created an email account with the name Jessica, in that time, didn’t have a last name, and lost completely the original e-mail addy, was something like jessica234
But I forgot it, in one of the era of no dressing.

Well enough of past history post. Other day I might write more.

Enjoy the week
Jessica

Looking Back

This weekend I dressed up again.
But this time I didn't went out, I stayed locked in home, reading a while.
But also giving myself sometime to reflect back on what I did in the past two times.

Was it too risky to do what I did? Probably yes

Was it a dangerous to go into the park like that at night? Yes, more probably was, even with my precautions, and going a few days before as boy to check out the surroundings.

Was I risking too much being seen or spotted by someone who might recognize me? Well the probability did exist, but according to my knowledge was pretty minimal.

Should I have not done it? Well, probably not the way I did it, probably would have been wiser to do it earlier or with someone, but I ciertanly was not ready for the first one, and no one could go with me, since I was not telling any one about Jessica, so someone went with me.

Was I scared? Yes I was, I went into the edge of panic several times, once even fled, walking but fleeing anyway. But that was part of it, to be scared of doing it, so I can realize It was just a little fear I was able to overcome.

Did I managed to overcome the fear? More probably NO, but I did manage to do it any way , so maybe didn't overcome fear, but managed enough to do it.

Would I do it again? Yes, just need to find when, maybe next time I managed to do it to a place with people, or going with someone else. Or if I just repeat the late alone trip, at least be carefull enough to minimize the risks and not panic so easily.

Or perhaps, I will just go crazy, and do some stupid thing, and enjoy the adrenaline ride, hopping my luck saves me again, who knows.

Kisses
Silly Jessica

The fake Nail Thingies

The fake Nail Thingies

So this weekend I was doing house chores, which included putting some order inside Jessica's makeup and stuff box.

So while on that, was seeing if I still got all fake nails for each set. And yes, they were all inside the box, 10 for each color.

When I finished, I like how the groups looked, like little thingies all lined up, so I took a picture.

And help me decide which ones to use next day when trying a previous outfit, but this time showing my face.

Still have trouble maneuvering stuff with the long nails on my hands, but guess with time and use, will get use to them, just like the heels, at start I walked all weird as if I was to fall down at every step, now I can walk normally, perhaps still need to work into doing it in feminine way, but no feel of falling down.

Now I'm just writting with no sense of anything, better stop.

Kisses

Jessica

Lessons from last weekend

A few friends via messenguer and some comments are similar to what I thought after I returned from the park, and next day, more calmed put some thought into the adventure.

Basically It was way too risky to do it, I was really lucky everything went as it happened.

By going into panic so quickly and easilly, I did behave in ways that might be a little suspicios and draw more attention than if not in panic. And definitively, attention from people was the last thing I wanted that night.

I need to be more confident on myself, and maybe next time try in a less late hour, even if there is people around. (Of course that would need to be in another city)

And I need to buy a purse, the camera bag, not feminine, plus can't fit all stuff I might need to carry

Hugs from Crazy
Jessica

The park adventure

So here is the rest of the story, the answer to the question “Did Jessica manage to be brave enough to go into the park?”, Guess no-one will read, since the photo answers the question. But I like writing about it, so here it is.

So I was in the car, next to the park, trying to build enough courage, and say “Hey , Jessica, is now or never”, and there I go, down the car, and start walking toward center area of the park, as I am walking, I see that in one of opposite corners of the park, seems to be a couple walking into the park. “Oh no, Oh no”, I went into panic, and turn around, and walk as fast as possible back to my car, and go away.

As I am driving away from the park, I am thinking, “Oh gosh, my bad luck, just when I finally get courage, someone walks into the park, and I run away”, but as I was driving the panic went away I thought, “Mmm, lets try once more, probably the couple was just walking by, and park is alone again” So I drove back, parked the car again, and look around to see if the park was empty.

It seems like the park was empty again, so there I go, down the car again, I walk to center area of the Park, look around and it was indeed empty. So I walk a little bit around, trying to enjoy my walking as much as the fear allowed me to. As I was walking around the park a boy in a bicycle passed by street closest to where I was standing at the moment. I freeze there, and to my horror the boy turn his head to watch me and then he whistled, oh gosh, the horror turned into panic, adrenalin all going crazy, I was ready to start running away, but the boy then turned to the front and just kept going his way. What a big relief I felt.

After that I decided it was time to get a picture to remember this adventure. At one side of the central area of the park there is a monument, with a wide base point, which seemed to be helpful to leave the camera and run to pose for a pic. So there I go, and try one pic, unfortunately camera had trouble with lighting and pic resulted all blurry and lots of brightness. I took sample shots to several directions. The pic is the one that shows better and still is too blurry and with bad quality.

So after taking the pics, I go and sit down in a bench in the park to see the pics, and calm down a little more. Finally decide its time to go home, and start walking towards the car, gosh I was really unlucky that night, and I saw a car turning to same street my car was. Quickly I thought of turning back and raise my hand toward my head, so if anything the people inside the car would just see me from the back as if I was talking on my mobile phone. As the car pass by, I turn my head a little and what I see is the man in passenger side with his head outside the window looking towards me. Oh gosh, the horror. Then at as the car arrives to the corner it stops down and I panic (they needed to stop since other street had right of passage, but at the moment I forgot it), and in the panic, all I thought about doing was to go towards the car and get in, from passenger side, not worrying if I have to slide over to driver’s seat. But as I am going inside my car, the other car follow its way.

I stayed there sit inside my car for a couple of minutes, before going down to get back in, on the driver side, to drive back to the safety of my home. From all the fear, excitement, adrenaline, it took me a couple of hours to finally fall sleep, but I slept happy to know I finally have managed to do it, and that everything had gone almost as good as I expected.

Kisses
Jessica

A second Drive out

So here is the chronicle of the second drive adventure, .
So Sunday night I decided to take another drive dressed as Jessica. Why?? Well it was fun last time, all the fears, all the adrenaline, being nervous, and at the end feeling all happy about being successful in doing it.

So there I go, after taking a few pics with the outfit I already showed, I waited watching TV until it was near midnight again. And look through the window, apparently street is empty, So there goes Jessica, outside again and into the car.

So I go for the same route, and I am heading two blocks ahead to make the first trip around, so there I am going and as I am entering next block, lots of cars parked, and a few people walking by, and as soon as I turned the corner, Oh no, several cars in line, moving really slowly, several people on the street walking by. The reason, in that street there is a funeral house, and apparently someone was being held in funeral service, so there were lots of people arriving in theirs cars, and walking towards the service.
Maybe I am too much of a paranoid, but I am completely sure at least a few of the people walking by were able to see me while I was driving by. So for the rest of the driving, no going into that street.

A few minutes later I drove by a park I have spotted in previous drive by, with enough lighting, and apparently alone. At the moment I pass by, one of the food stands there was still there, but they were just closing and picking their stuff, so all I had to do was drive for maybe 20 minutes to give them time to finish packing and go. (I have previously went to the park in boy mode at Friday night to see if it was safe enough for a girl to go there for a little walk at night)

So there I am driving around, at some street very empty, I stop the car, trying to took a couple of pics, but I didn’t like the result at the end, so I am posting this one, which actually helps to explain the following since this skirt was a little problematic, as I was driving and stepping on the break and gas pedals, the skirt was slowly moving up, to the point a few times I had to slow down to move it down my legs to a more decent position. So now I have learned this skirt is not so suitable for driving.

So finally I went by the little park again, and it is now empty, so I stop the car in the less used street next to it, turn engine off, and sit there for a minute, trying to get enough courage to go down the car and take a walk into the park.

Did I manage to do it?? Well I’ll write about that, probably tomorrow.

Jejeje, what a lame cliffhanger line I just wrote,

Kisses
Driving Girl
Jessica

this weekend outfit

So there I went, this weekend again trying to gain confidence to go out.

This is outfir I used, later this week I will writing about what happened.

Kisses
Jessica

Was I surprised or Scared

My face looks funny in this pic
Was i surprised of something I saw??
Or have I seen a ghost that scared me??

Actually if I would have seen a ghost i would be jumping of happinness

I know, I know, all my close-minded science teachers said ghost does not exist,

I know lots of people use ghost to scam people money, I hate those people since they gave bad reputation to ghost.

But as a kid, being fan of horror movies, one of my dreams was to see a ghost.

So definitively a ghost would not scare me.

Driving Miss Jessica

I know, I know, I am a vain girl, posting all the pictures first and leaving the adventure telling for the end, Maybe it is some kind of subversive marketing plot, jejeje. Or just was the chronological order of the pics.

Well here it goes. So you have seen that this weekend I dress up, and took some pics, after that I decided to relax a little by seeing a movie thinking that by the end of it I would took make-up and clothes off and go to sleep.

But no, some kind of evil demon put some crazy thought on my mind, so as I power down the DVD thingie, I start thinking about doing something really really stupid. So I grab the camera bag, and put keys, wallet and cell phone in it, and head to the door.

A last sense of carefulness appeared, as I reached the window, to see if the neighbors were outside their homes chatting, but the street seemed to be all empty. And so I did it, I opened the door, and let Jessica see the outside world. I stood at the door frame for a second, a last chance to go back, and not do such stupid risky thing, but my legs decided to do the opposite, and gave the first step to the outside.

I closed my home door and run to the car, as quickly and ladylike as possible I jump inside. Sitting there I had one last thought, one last moment to stop that nonsense and go back home. Starting to think of all the fears of doing it. What if at a crossing someone sees me, what if that person recognize me, what if a police car stop me, or the worst happens and I crash??. For a second those thoughts were struggling in my mind. But the last drop of craziness finally got its way, and slowly my hand turned the car engine on. Brrrm, that sound put me into driving mode.

Check the lights, adjust seatplace (yep, had to put it a little back, guess the heels add length to my feet), adjust mirrors, fasten seatbelt, first gear, and ready to go, Brrrruuum, and there goes Jessica driving the car. All full of fears but driving for her first time in life.

So there I go, two blocks down, then turn left, one block, left again, just trying to get myself to take a little ride around the block, so sooner than expected I am back at the street I live. I was like "Eh, what, the ride is over, but I was having so much fun, no,no, I want more" and listening to my crazy mind, I stepped the gas pedal, and leave home and a little bit of my fears of driving behind.

And so there I went, every time riding a few more blocks away, worrying when at corners I had to stop as I waited for the other cars to pass by, worried when at one corner with a taco stand, people there turned their heads to look at me (well to tell the truth I was more worried maybe one of them was someone who knew me, fortunately all were strangers to me), and worried when at one corner a boy in his truck waived to me, letting me pass even when he had preference to go first (that was a confidence boost, guess from far, inside the car and little light, he thought I was a girl). Worried when later I stopped at some point and took a few pics of me inside the car, this one being the less ugly one.

So I drove for around 30 minutes, well not sure really about how much time, but that is my guess. As I come back close to home, checked no-one was around, and park the car. Go down, and open the door and run back inside to safety, out from the eyes of whoever might pass by. (Actually a car went by as I was opening the door, but most they would see was my back, so no problem there, I think)

And so ends the adventure of Driving Miss Jessica.

Kisses
A driving girl
Jessica

Relaxing a little trying to look innocent

I like how this pic look, kind of innocent, yet manage to show some leg.

Jejej, just being vain and showing off.

Kisses
Jessica

A really weird, stupid, undesired, insulting e-mail

I received an E-mail from a person Identified as Paul from some (li- ve -y -oo) place

Basically they wanted me to join some place on internet to make me appear on webcam and pay me, in other words to make me a (wh- o -re), or (pro- sti- ti -tut -e)

I am so angry, who the hell they think I am.

An Angry
Jessica

Here is the copy of the body of email


Hello

We have the pleasure to offer you a fantastic occasion to make money and to have a lot of amusement at the same time.

We look for models girls, tranny or shemales of all over the world, alone or in couple of all the countries including Asia, Arabia, Latino, Africa, America and Europe.

Requirements Models:
* You are attractive, confident?
* Being relaxed in front of your WebCam?

Not Travels To work.
More than On-line Hours = More Profit.

Our Dutch company is the specialist webcam.

I take care of the sector of the models, girls, tranny and shemale which is the good sector with the webcam, we have many customers.

You can to work at home with our system
You need

1) Your artist's name
2) 6 photos of you
3) We have a discription very detailed how to install
- Required equipment: Pentium 4 or equivalent, Windows XP, Almost every camera USB works, but the best is Logitech Sphere.
As our video is good quality, you need a rather good webcam,
But one not expensive, there is in about of 100 $ rather good, if there is a zoom with remote control it is better to satisfy the customers.
- The requirements of connection are a debit of minimum 256Ko Almost every Cable Or Adsl works.

There are two sorts of video chat
The private cat is a gossip
And the nudechat is a gossip the price is less expensive but he can there have several customers joined on the same model, 1 , 2 , 3, 5 , 10 or more without limit. And so more profit

Price
You receive 50 % of incomes, the other companies give only 30 %

A wallpaper made by a friend

A friend made this image that is kind of a wallpaper

I like the result, is pretty.

You can visit my friend Citlaly at
her blog

Natural and Blue

So here is the new skirt I bought, Is really comfortable and easy to wear.
I tryed to repeat the same pose, for both lighting schemes in the picture.
The one to the right, show the colors in a more closed way to real colors (or as real as I see them) the one in the left, hast this cool light blue tone, which I kind of feel makes the image look more relaxed.

Kisses
Jessica

Summer Starts Today

So summer starts today

Supposed to be the longest day with sun, too bad I can go out and enjoy it in a nice summer girly outfit.

But maybe sometime son I would be able to.

Happy Summer Days



Kisses

Jessica

Draw of Jessica made by Zully

A friend named Zully made this drawing of me, of course with a little changes to enhance feminity.
Can you guess the image t was based on??

Thanks a lot to Zully
She made a superb, amazing drawing
Kisses

This weekend Mayan Trip

This weekend I travel to a Mayan site, called Palenque.
Lots of Pyramids, really big place.
Unfortunately the main Pyramid, the one with the tomb was closed, so only got to see the replica at the museum.
Lots of walking, lots of climbing plus the hot weather can get you tired really quickly.
Ended up all tired and legs are exhausted.
Really cool thing, is that it is located near the jungle, being able to hear all the birds and monkeys so close was great.
Bad thing, the mosquitoes got several bites on legs and arms.
Next day went to see the waterfalls, wow they sure are impressive.
Went swimming there.
Then driving 4 to 5 hours, I ended up all tired
But fun weekend.

Kisses
Jessica

Sent to me

A weird pose pic.

And admirer sent me this

J amas en el recio universo
E ncontrar crei, a un angel androgino,
S i bien la travesia del mismo
S e tornaba ya desesperante, aun
I ncluso la desesperanza llego,mas
C uando todo perdido parecia
A ti,mi dulce musa encontre en el firmamento

by Dragon Rojo
If I translate to English, it lost the letters

Another historical post

Wow, again so much time has passed between historical posts (jeje, better come out with a better name, this one sounds and reminds me of the boring school subject)

Well as I was telling in my last past post, I have returned to this dressing activity, and one might think that having a house alone would bring more opportunities to do it, make it easier. But that was not completely true, since I still had too many conflicts in my mind about it.

But this time, there was something that helped me. By that time, I have found about a thing called Internet. You go into it, look about a subject, and Voila, hundreds of pages with info about it.

Well all confused, I decided to look information on the subject of my dressing. The first problem was "What to look for?" by that time didn't know the terminology related to the subject (and as of today I still don't get the difference between all those t-something labels) but I started writing whatever come to mind. On one of those searches I found a page (unfortunately I don't remember the page) but the thing was that it contained the words transvestite y crossdressing and kind of what they meant, so at least I knew what to search for.

So I went searching for those words, but the only results I got where for previews of porn sites. Yes the girls on the pics look amazing, all femenine except for that detail that most of the time was with blur or semiconcealed, so might not even be sure was not a composed image. That instead of helping me, made me feel worst. Yes the looked great, but from that th e only explanation that come to mind about this dressing thing, was that apparently the option was to become like some kind of visual object that appears on porn sites, and that was not something that I thought of.

I was about to give up when a webpage came out, of a person who looked like more real, a girl from Hungary by the name Hajnalka, actually at first look of her pics, I was thinking, hey thats a genetic girl, and a pretty one. But after looking with more atention and reading her page find out it was someone like me, with this interest in dressing with girl clothes, and she managed to acheive that in such a wonderful and perfect way. Wow amazing, that put me dreaming in that maybe sometime in the future I might be able to do something similar to that (and I am still dreaming about it)

The best thing was that she had links to pages to other girls, some of them real beauty godesses, other less experienced but with that touch of feminity, And some of the girls pages, told their histories, some very similar to mine, Some even had a large amount on information, about the why, the how, why is it a normal thing, why is not always something to do with sexual behavior. Lots of information that little by little helped me to kind of understand more this liking of me.

I stop the story here, next time I will write about my first run into the internet, and why I choosed the name Jessica.

Bye by now
Kisses
Jessica

Showing too much skin

Wearing the mini blue outfit.
Guess I am looking to draw attention
How vain am I?

The pic is small, yes I know I posted that way on purpose

Kisses
Jessica

A chronicle a little too late

Due to me being too busy, and probably a little lazy to write, here is a late chronicle of one of Jessica´s crazy adventures.
So the weekend from two weeks ago, I decided to risk my secret identity once more.
This time, was a girl, who lives in the same place I live.
As usual I was nervous from the moment I decided to say "Ok, let's meet"

So we met in an open area near my place (in case I decided to run away).
We then went ono to my place, and me being all nervous took a few minutes before saying "ok, lets start getting all dressed"
Each of us , changed in one of the rooms of my place.
Then saw each other dressed up. She had a great feminine figure (I felt envy, guess I need to put extra effort to loose some weight)
We then chatted a little, but soon it become more of me asking her lots of questions, she being lot more experienced in this than me.
We then took a couple of pics, but she needed to go somewhere, and time to say bye.

I stayed a few more hours dressed, reading and listening some music, before I got hungry.
So out goes the pretty clothes and makeup, and out to lunch.

So ends the chronicle.
Pic is the outfit I used.

Hugs
Jessica